2000.11.1.10 Responding To Rebelliousness Or Treachery On The Part Of A Wife Created by James3 on 7/4/2019 6:21:53 PM Responding To Rebelliousness Or Treachery On The Part Of A Wife
In preparing a series of teachings on marriage which have covered a wide variety of topics, a number of factors have come to attention:
a. God intended marriage to work.
b. The church today knows almost nothing about God's form of marriage and how He intended marriage to work.
c. The wife tears down or builds up the husbands house.
d. The wife must submit in everything, even if her husband is unjust and ungodly, just as Jesus submitted to those who crucified Him unjustly.
e. The husband is the head and must seek to become like Jesus.
f. Divorce is a matter of last resort and is only permitted in the case of persistent unrepented treachery.
g. A wife who is in strife and disagreement with her husband causes a sensation likened to "rottenness in his bones" and can destroy her husband financially by insisting on going her own way and dividing her husbands house.
These conclusions give rise to a dilemma - if Divorce is ONLY applicable as a matter of last resort after persistent unrepented treachery and if a wife can destroy her husbands house by continuous wilful disagreement, what remedies does the husband have to manage this situation?
Genesis 2:24, together with Matthew 19:5-6, Mark 10:8 and Ephesians 5:30-32, based on the original language, clearly demonstrate that the one flesh bond is an unbreakable spiritual bond. Other scriptures taken together with Genesis 2:24 clearly indicates that the marriage covenant is cut when a man takes a woman's virginity and that multiple one flesh bonds can be formed and can give rise to the spiritual states known as "adultery" and "fornication" which are amongst the most appalling forms of spiritual carnage that are possible.
Conversely, as a man and women give themselves to one another in sexual love making, to the fullest extent possible, the one flesh bond becomes massively strong and the spirits of the husband and wife become knit together so that they are truly one and can communicate, spirit to spirit, over great distances as though they were speaking face to face. When this has been reached, their prayers become extremely powerful. However, very few people reach this level of the one flesh bond, in fact it is probably almost unknown in the current age.
If husband and wife are in constant strife and have erected emotional and spiritual barriers which inhibit their giving in love making, the one flesh bond will remain weak and undeveloped and their marriage will remain vulnerable. This is another reason why rebellion and strife on the part of a wife is so immensely destructive within marriage.
As this journey continued, I became greatly aware of Ephesians 5:24 which states:
24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. (NKJ)
Wives are told to submit to their husbands in EVERYTHING. Not just that which they approve of, not just that which they enjoy, not just that which is lawful, not just that which is scriptural, but EVERYTHING!
1 Peter 3:1-2 takes this further:
1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,
2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. (NKJ)
The word LIKEWISE here refers back to the previous chapter which tells us to submit to unjust masters and rulers in the same way that Jesus submitted to those who unjustly crucified Him who "knew no sin" and who could have called legions of angels to deliver him. In other words, this confirms Ephesians 5:24. Wives are to submit, no matter how unjust or unGodly their husbands are.
This revelation provides a whole new dimension to why a woman should not marry a man who is an unbeliever.
It also became apparent that, if a wife will truly submit in everything, in submission to scripture, God will intervene supernaturally to protect a wife whose husband goes to far, provided she walks in faith.
Submission is amazingly powerful, we just do not understand that power in this age. We must learn to submit like Jesus submitted! This includes submission to unjust Governments, etc!
As I prayed into and studied the subject, I became increasingly aware of the deep need for husband and wife to be in perfect unity AND HARMONY. The Lord showed me that the husband was like the organ in a group of musical instruments and the wife was like a stringed instrument which had to be tuned to the same "key" as the organ so that all musicians played in HARMONY.
Harmony is beyond agreement. Harmony is the full power of marriage through the one flesh bond. Once a really strong one flesh bond is in place and husband and wife are in full agreement AND in harmony, their prayers are amongst the sweetest incense that the Father can receive, their prayers are full of authority because there is complete agreement. Once their spirits are truly one and are in perfect unity and harmony, amazing spiritual power is unleashed. This is one of the reasons Satan is so intent on destroying marriage.
The following are a few scriptures which address this point:
Matthew 12:25
25 But Jesus knew their thoughts, and said to them: "Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and every city or house divided against itself will not stand. (NKJ)
Luke 11:17
17 But He, knowing their thoughts, said to them: "Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls. (NKJ)
Amos 3:3
3 Can two walk together, unless they are agreed? (NKJ)
Matthew 18:19
19 "Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven. (NKJ)
1 Peter 3:7
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honour to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (NKJ)
It cannot be stressed enough, a husband and wife who are not in agreement are a house which is DIVIDED and it CANNOT STAND, their prayers will be hindered and not answered, their lives in material and SPIRITUAL TERMS, will be a total MESS.
Yet, there is so much teaching about wives having their own identity, etc that goes against the very grain of this principle. Other teaching uses 1 Peter 3:7 to make it the responsibility of the husband to come into agreement with his wife. That is not what this verse says. It says that because they are weak, husbands should be patient, tolerant, loving, etc and accept that their wives may not immediately see things the way the husband does. Like Jesus treats us, the husband is to gently guide and lead his wife. If he does not, their prayers will be hindered.
There CANNOT be a godly marriage where the husband is in submission to the wife. He will then expect Jesus to submit to him!
The ULTIMATE objective is for the husband and wife to be in such perfect unity that their spirits harmonize at all times, they not only sing from the same song book but they ALSO sing in the same KEY AND they sing in HARMONY!
As revelation continued to come in the area of marriage, it became apparent that, as the husband is head of the wife and Jesus is head of the husband, the relationship between the husband and the wife is often (not always) a mirror of the relationship between the husband and the Lord Jesus Christ!
In other words:
a. If the wife is not giving first priority to the things the husband considers most important and is, in fact, leaving them frequently to the last and then not doing them at all, it is probably because the husband is treating his calling in the same way.
b. If the wife is always arguing and insists on holding on to opposing views, it is probably because the husband is always arguing with Jesus and holding onto views which are contrary to scripture.
c. If the wife is not submitting to her husband it is probably because the husband is not submitting to Jesus.
d. If the wife's service and commitment to her husband is shabby, then it is probably because the husband's own service and commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ is shabby? Refer to Malachi for more on the topic of poor service to God and second rate (or shabby) offerings.
e. If the wife is giving love and submission unwillingly and grudgingly and is making false accusations against the husband, then it is probable that the husband is giving love and submission unwillingly and grudgingly to Jesus and Yahweh and is making false accusations against Him through false doctrines, etc.
f. If the wife is constantly finding fault with her husband, then it is likely that the husband is constantly finding fault with God.
g. If the wife is slow to repent when she is in error, it is probably because the husband is slow to repent to Jesus when he is in error.
h. If the wife is not making love to the husband in a pleasing and fulfilling manner, it is probably because the husband is not praising and worshipping Jesus in a manner that is pleasing to Jesus.
i. etc.
The bottom line is, husband, if you don't like something about the way your wife treats you, it is probably a reflection of the manner in which you are treating Jesus! What you are sowing you are reaping!
This is actually grace from God because it provides the husband with a more tangible indicator of his relationship with Jesus from which he can learn, make adjustments, and see if the adjustments are taking effect.
The relationship between the father and the children is a similar mirror of the relationship between the father and God the Father (Yahweh) and the relationship between the children and the mother is a similar mirror of her relationship with her husband. All of these spiritual "mirrors" are grace from God to assist us to draw closer to Him.
This revelation provides a startling indication as to why it is generally unacceptable in the sight of God for a man to divorce his wife because of her unacceptable conduct. If Yahweh were to apply the same standards, Jesus would reject us!!
If the husband uses these mirrors as an indicator and takes action to correct his behaviour towards Jesus but the wife persists in her conduct because she does not want to change behaviour learned over time, then a situation of division may arise which requires further action. This is the subject of this document. THEN AND ONLY THEN is she truly in rebellion and is betraying her husband spiritually.
By definition, a wife is under her husband's covering in the same way that the husband is under Jesus' covering.
I was shown that the "covering" can be seen as a sort of rigid "umbrella". As long as one is under the umbrella, that is under the covering, nothing can harm you. Once you step out from under the umbrella by sinning, all the forces of hell rain down upon you and Satan will attack any way that he can.
The same applies to a wife. As long as she is in complete submission to her husband, nothing can touch her. All attacks will be directed first at the husband, because he is the covering. So, if he sins but she remains in submission, he will bear the FULL brunt of his sin.
However, if the wife is in rebellion, not only will her sin attract attack which will come primarily on the husband BUT a proportion will rain down on her directly.
The Lord showed me two elderly women of similar age whose husbands had known each other since childhood, had been in similar professional occupations and who had lived in the same town most of their lives. The one woman had been willingly in submission to her husband throughout his life and he had lived to a ripe old age and she was still sprightly and full of life. The other had insisted on doing things "her way" and had not been in full submission. Her husband had died at a much earlier age and in poor health and she was bent over and stooped under the weight of the sin she had brought down on herself by continuously stepping out from under her husbands covering AND undermining her husband. The contrast was STARTLING!
The Lord also showed me that a woman who has reached adulthood without marrying, and particularly one who has started her own career, lived on her own and had her own job before marrying, establishes a sort of "proxy" self covering for herself as an offshoot from her fathers covering. If this proxy covering is not renounced and torn down and actively replaced by her husbands covering at the time of marriage, she will experience immense difficulty in accepting her husband's covering and submitting to him.
Where a woman has been married and divorced and remarries, she will still be walking under her ex husbands covering unless she renounces this covering and accepts the covering of her new husband, assuming that her divorce was sanctioned by God, which is the case with a relatively limited number of divorces.
Because of the power of the one flesh bond, which makes the wife bone of the husbands bones and flesh of his flesh, she is able to cause a sensation of "rottenness in his bones", Proverbs 12:4 states that "An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones." (NKJ)
By the same token, Proverbs 14:1 states "The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands." (NKJ)
The imagery is powerful. A wife has been given enormous potential for good or bad in her husbands house.
Again, this poses the dilemma, what does a God fearing man do when his wife repeatedly conducts herself in a manner that causes her to be to him as rottenness in his bones and which pulls his house down? Particularly, if he is seeking to love her unconditionally like Jesus loves and he cannot bear the thought of divorcing her but he cannot see any other way? This document develops a scriptural approach to this problem.
As I gained understanding in these areas, I became increasingly conscious of the need to love like Jesus loved. A love which takes 1 Corinthians 13 and Galatians 5 literally:
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.
And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love,
I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked,thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. (NKJ)
1 Corinthians 13:1-8
But the FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT is: LOVE, JOY (Gladness) PEACE PATIENCE (an even temper, forbearance) KINDNESS GOODNESS (benevolence) FAITHFULNESSGENTLENESS (meekness, humility) SELF-CONTROL (self restraint, continenceAgainst such things there is no law.
Galatians 5:22-23
The Lord led me to purchase the book "Lord Teach Me How To Love", by Creflo Dollar which challenged me immensely.
As I applied these principles and opened my heart I began to experience a physically tangible flow of love. Joyner describes an experience in "The Final Quest" which describes this far better than I can, describing the Love that he experienced from a particular person he reports:
"Opening his arms he gave me a great hug, and kissed my forehead like a father. Love poured over me and through me until I felt that it would overload my nervous system. When he finally released me I was staggering as if I were drunk, but it was a wonderful feeling. It was love like I had never felt it."
I began to realize that love like this is available to each of us and it is particularly available to husband and wife in marriage. THIS is the love that husbands are commanded in scripture to give their wives!!
But, to experience this love, we must love unconditionally, we must take down all our defences and we must GIVE EXPECTING NOTHING IN RETURN. THEN we will experience this love flowing out of us to our wives, our children and those around us and THEY will experience it flowing from us to the extent that they are WILLING to receive.
A wife who has her own defences up, who is not in submission to her husband, who is betraying, criticising, finding fault with or attacking her husband will have great difficulty receiving such love.
I also came to understand that this form of love is POWER - this is the power whereby Jesus raised the dead, healed the sick, etc. It is the LOVE OF GOD AND THE POWER OF GOD!!
Until we come to walk in this love we are powerless and useless to God and our spouses and our children!! This is an immensely sobering realization as very few people on earth today even consider that such love can exist, let alone walk in it!
At the same time I discovered that love has some of the characteristics of an electric current - that is why we sometimes experience tingling and similar sensations under the anointing. It flows to those who will receive it BUT, if a man's wife is in bondage to fear, doubt and unbelief and these trigger rebellion and lack of submission in her - this connects her to Satan's NEGATIVE power - this is not a power source, it is a power drain.
So when a man is starting to walk in this kind of love and his wife suddenly opens her heart to fear or rebellion, he is connected directly to the Power of God (Love) and she is connected directly to the power hungry world of Satan's fear which is NEVER SATISFIED. This produces an outcome like a short circuit in electricity. If a massive positive electric potential is suddenly directly connected to earth with no resistance, massive electric current's flow until the conductor burns out or the power source is exhausted.
In this case, God's love is NEVER exhausted, so the conductor, the husband, suffers MASSIVE spiritual overload and finds himself completely spiritually debilitated! Because he is one with Christ and is starting to tap into the Love Power of God and his wife is walking in fear and is tapping into the negative drain of Satan's power, something has to give!
Either:
a. The husband puts up a barrier between himself and Jesus Christ and stops tapping into the power of God.
b. The husband puts up a barrier between himself and his wife to prevent her short circuiting his love to fear.
c. The wife changes her behaviour, resists fear, submits to her husband and receives his love and loves him in return.
Clearly the first option is unthinkable - to do this the man would be making an idol of his wife and putting her before his love for Jesus.
Equally clearly the third option is the option to be preferred.
HOWEVER, sadly, the wife does not always see things this way. If she is in bondage to fear and is believing Satan's lies, she cannot necessarily take the spiritual measures necessary to resist Satan and accept her husbands love in humble submission. In such a case, the husband is left with NO CHOICE but to adopt the second option, that is to put in place a protective barrier to prevent his wife's fear, doubt and unbelief, from short circuiting his love.
In doing this, he must act in love in order that he can come to the place where "perfect love casts out all fear"!
Incidentally, a similar thing happens in our relationship with Jesus and the Father. If we tap into fear, He cannot pour His love into us because we would be destroyed by the raw spiritual power flowing through us. We have to resist the devil and in particular, resist fear, and seek His Love.
If we do not and get into increasing sin, there comes a time when our disloyalty creates a distance / separation in which He is forced to take His hand off us and permit us to go the way we have chosen. At this time He cannot pay attention to certain of our prayers -- many people have described this as a "brass ceiling" experience. Note that in a Court of Law a "prayer" is the request or application of the applicant in a Court action -- if the applicant is legally disqualified, then the court pays no attention to the prayer.
At this point, Satan has effectively Carte Blanche to use all our sin and to attack us in any way he chooses.
Note that Yahweh does not command or force our love or submission to Him. He gives us a free choice. By the same token, a husband cannot command or force his wife to love him or submit to him. The husband thus finds himself in a VERY difficult position.
This spiritual short circuit is the fundamental driver behind God's SPIRITUAL definition of treachery or fornication (porneia) which is the ultimate scriptural basis for divorce. That is, when a point is reached where the disloyalty and the treachery and the resulting spiritual short circuit have become so entrenched and so persistent and the wife shows no signs of repenting, then, and ONLY THEN, may the husband divorce her.
Again, we find ourselves with a gap in our understanding between the point at which the husband first becomes aware of this short circuit or treachery and the point at which his wife's persistent treachery warrants divorce in the sight of God.
God's way is easy and profitable but requires personal self-discipline and VOLUNTARY SACRIFICE. Rebellion is an insistence on seeing God's way as being burdensome, unprofitable and personally prejudicial. This results in refusal to discipline oneself and to give the required sacrifices of service, love, praise and worship. Rebellion favours self-service, self-love, self-righteousness and general idolatry of self! Rebellion stems from pride, from "I", from Satan.
Godly love is something that is given freely, so it is godly submission. If a wife refuses to love her husband in terms of a 1 Corinthians 13 (believes the best, etc, etc) he can do nothing about it in his own strength.
As much as his spirit is grieved and hurt, there is NOTHING he can do to obtain loyalty, love and submission that she chooses not to given as a free-will offering. The more he shouts, castigates and upbraids, her in response to her treachery, the more fear will grab her and entrench the lies that she believes about him!
This is profoundly challenging in terms of the scriptures regarding rottenness in the bones, etc.
If the husband seeks to walk in love and put God first in his life, the more the love of God flows through him to his wife, the more debilitating any act of treachery on her part will be. He in turn is required not to revile (1 Peter 2).
In considering this situation, we must note that nowhere in Scripture do we find any verses that expressly command or even permit a husband to discipline a rebellious wife.
Although one might argue from the scriptures relating to the "chastening of The Lord (Yahweh1)" that there is some basis:
Deuteronomy 11:2 : "Know today that I do not speak with your children, who have not known and who have not seen the chastening of the LORD your God, His greatness and His mighty hand and His outstretched arm-- (NKJ)
Job 5:17 : "Behold, happy is the man whom God corrects; therefore do not despise the chastening of the Almighty. (NKJ)
Proverbs 3:11 : "My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, nor detest His correction; (NKJ)
Hebrews 12:4-9 :
4 You have not yet resisted to bloodshed, striving against sin.
5 And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons: "My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him;
6 For whom the Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives."
7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten?
8 But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons.
9 Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? (NKJ)
HOWEVER, all of these relate to Yahweh (The Father) treating us as children NOT Jesus disciplining His bride. So the scriptures apply to a father and his children NOT a husband and his wife. BUT, this does indicate that either Yahweh or Jesus will discipline the wife since Yahweh disciplines us on behalf of His Son, Jesus, presumably Jesus will discipline our wives on our behalf! Yahweh uses Satan as the "adversary" or "destroyer" to discipline us, as is clearly shown by Job's experience.
This is the bottom line of the answer I got to my prayer about how to respond to a treacherous wife when a husband has done all he knows to do to get his own life right with Yahweh1. The answer was simply, "hand her over to Satan that she may learn to submit"!!
In terms of the preceding discussion it is apparent that a time will come where the husband is no longer able to bear these attacks by his wife. This assumes that he HAS laid down his life in prayer and fasting and in seeking Yahweh for guidance in judgement of his own sin AND the sin of his house. Also that he has accepted his accountability before God for the sin of his house and has responsibly sought to deal with every area of sin in his life and the life of his family that the Holy Spirit has convicted him of.
Once he has done these things, and ONLY once he has done them to Yahweh's satisfaction, will the husband find himself in a position to take the next step which is to withdraw his covering and hand his wife over to Satan to be disciplined for her OWN sin. The husband REMAINS accountable to Yahweh for his sin and the broader sin of his house and must realise that when he takes this step, he must expect any areas of his life where he is being less than diligent in attending to correcting his own sin to come under a harsh spotlight before the judgement seat!
1 Corinthians 5:4-7 provides the scriptural basis for this:
4 In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when you are gathered together, along with my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ,
5 deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
6 Your glorying is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump?
7 Therefore purge out the old leaven, that you may be a new lump, since you truly are unleavened. For indeed Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us. (NKJ)
This passage relates to a particular instance of sexual sin which is not relevant to this discussion but it confirms a scriptural principle which is clearly evident in the passages regarding the chastening of The Lord cited above and particularly in Job's experience.
From consideration of this it became clear that once the husband has done all that he can do, by which I mean repeated prayer, prayer and fasting, humbling himself before Almighty God and repenting and making right, explicitly acknowledging his covering before God and explicitly praying to extend his covering over his wife and accepting responsibility for her sins AND seeing his relationship with Jesus and Yahweh mirrored in his wife and children respectively and diligently seeking to walk in 1 Corinthians 13 love, THEN and only THEN AND preferably at the leading of the Spirit of God, may he take action against his wife.
Such action will comprise:
a. The husband withdraws his covering over his wife in respect of all sin where she is not in submission to him and is in rebellion to him.
b. The husband asks the Father in the Name of Jesus to JUDGE his wife severely and correct her harshly that they may come into unity before God.
At the same time, the husband must continue to seek God's judgments in his OWN LIFE.
c. The husband hands his wife OVER TO SATAN that she may learn to submit, cease to fear and cease to rebel.
d. The husband increases his intercession and prayer for his wife's deliverance and wages whatever spiritual warfare the Spirit of God leads him to wage.
e. The husband erects a spiritual barrier to prevent the short circuiting of his love. In other words, he does NOT stop loving her BUT HE DOES STOP POURING HIS LOVE OUT TO HER. In this mode he should refrain from sexual intercourse unless his wife expressly comes to him for love making, he should refrain from over acts of love (hugs, kisses, etc) towards his wife, unless she expressly comes to him for them with a submissive attitude. He should refrain from any other overt gestures of love that he has been making in an effort to win her affection.
A husband is NOT told anywhere in scripture to "court" his wife to win her affection. Both are commanded by scripture to love and the giving and receiving of love are required to be unconditional -- there is therefore NO onus on him to make overt gestures to win her love. In fact, a history of seeking to earn his wife's love MAY be at the heart of the problem.
The husband is NOT to be unpleasant to his wife in ANY way. He is not to sulk or in any other way punish her by his behaviour other than to send her a clear message that her behaviour is NOT acceptable and that he is obliged to take measures to safe guard himself spiritually.
f. At the same time, the husband should spell out to his wife that she is now accountable before God for her conduct in the areas stated and that he is no longer going to express continuous concern regarding unscriptural conduct -- this assumes that he has taken ALL REASONABLE MEASURES to ensure BEFORE taking this step, that his wife understands what behaviour is unacceptable and what the SCRIPTURAL BASIS is for his stating that this behaviour is unacceptable. A series of teaching tapes are available which address many of these factors in some detail.
Once this has been put in place, the husband MUST be sensitive to discern the point at which his wife is ready to repent and turn around. Whether that happens after a few hours or days or weeks can only be determined by the Spirit of God. If he is truly walking in love, the husband should be constantly on the look-out for indications of heartfelt desire for change and he should not hesitate to intervene when it appears certain that this is in place.
Since the husband is responsible for teaching his wife, he must then guide her to deal with whatever issues may be required and lead her gently to making the necessary confessions of her sin, repenting and receiving forgiveness from himself, praying the necessary prayers of confession, repentance and receiving of forgiveness to the Father. This is not a time for "I told you so", it is a time for sober rejoicing, at repentance and healing of the marriage relationship. 2 Corinthians 2:1-11 provides the scriptural basis for such restoration:
1 But I determined this within myself, that I would not come again to you in sorrow.
2 For if I make you sorrowful, then who is he who makes me glad but the one who is made sorrowful by me?
3 And I wrote this very thing to you, lest, when I came, I should have sorrow over those from whom I ought to have joy, having confidence in you all that my joy is the joy of you all.
4 For out of much affliction and anguish of heart I wrote to you, with many tears, not that you should be grieved, but that you might know the love which I have so abundantly for you.
5 But if anyone has caused grief, he has not grieved me, but all of you to some extent-- not to be too severe.
6 This punishment which was inflicted by the majority is sufficient for such a man,
7 so that, on the contrary, you ought rather to forgive and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one be swallowed up with too much sorrow.
8 Therefore I urge you to reaffirm your love to him.
9 For to this end I also wrote, that I might put you to the test, whether you are obedient in all things.
10 Now whom you forgive anything, I also forgive. For if indeed I have forgiven anything, I have forgiven that one for your sakes in the presence of Christ,
11 lest Satan should take advantage of us; for we are not ignorant of his devices. (NKJ)
At this point, the husband should, in the presence of his wife, expressly pray to extend his covering over his wife once more, to accept responsibility for her sin, to release all barriers he has erected AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, instruct Satan to desist from taking any further action against his wife independently of himself.
His wife in turn MUST understand that such an event in her life is EXTREMELY SERIOUS and is a step down a road which may ultimately lead to divorce and potentially loss of salvation. She should therefore reverently fear the recurrence of such a situation and should seek God and the guidance of her husband with renewed vigour in order to come into agreement and HARMONY with him.
Note that this action, which in terms of the current church paradigm would be viewed as very harsh, is to the contrary, an act of mercy. It is far better that an offender is handed over for disciplining than that they should be divorced, which implies that they are beyond redemption.
This is an immensely challenging subject. However, it is critical in this age where over two thirds of all marriages end in divorce with reports of more reports in the church than outside the church!
Furthermore, with increasing indications that GREAT spiritual tribulation is ALREADY upon many in the church and that great physical tribulation in the form of a possible third world war or major persecution is not far away, it is vital that all who call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ sanctify themselves and set themselves apart for His service. This REQUIRES that those whose marriages are not all they could be, take all necessary measures to seek Yahweh1 to restore and heal their marriages. The principles set out in this teaching and those that are presented in the tape series which preceded it, are vital to accomplishing this objective.
Finally, Yahweh1 intends marriage to be the most wonderful experience on earth. He literally intends it to be "heaven on earth" in terms of the magnitude of love, the magnitude of spiritual power, unity, etc. I challenge all who read this to set aside all ideas you have of marriage which do not fit this description and DARE TO BELIEVE THAT YOUR MARRIAGE CAN BE HEAVEN ON EARTH!!
May Yahweh (The Lord) bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you, in the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, King of Kings and Lord of Lords and saviour of the world.
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