2000.04.1.02d Some Thoughts On Divorce By Church Leaders Created by James3 on 6/28/2019 6:57:02 PM Some Thoughts On Divorce By Church Leaders
To all who call themselves by the name of Christ and truly seek to serve Him with all their hearts, all their souls, all their minds and all their strength.
Greetings in the Name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth,
In response to recent developments regarding divorce in church leadership, the question arises, will The Lord permit such divorces and what does His Word say concerning such issues. This document seeks to provide a preliminary understanding of some scriptures which are of critical import but which are not generally acknowledged in the church today.
In Matthew 5:32 in the King James Version states "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." (KJV) and Matthew 19:9 states "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery." (KJV)
In-depth analysis of the word translated "fornication" reveals that the Greek word is "porneia" which relates to sexual immorality and spiritual fornication and idolatry which can give rise to persistent betrayal of a spouse. This is analyzed in considerable detail in the book "The Scriptural Definition of Marriage" which clearly demonstrates from scripture that The Lord created marriage TO WORK!
Note that Deuteronomy 24:1, referred to in the passages of Matthew above, states "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favour in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, (NKJ). The Hebrew word translated "uncleanness" carries the same meaning of sexual or spiritual unfaithfulness or treachery as "porneia".
Based on generally stated reasons for divorce, the vast majority of divorces within the Christian church are NOT for porneia and are therefore "putting away" and NOT divorce in the sight of God!
Revelation 21:8 clearly states: "But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral[Gr pornos] , sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death." (NKJ) 1 Corinthians 6:9 states: "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, (NKJ). Accordingly, the only person who a believer can legitimately divorce is a person who has turned their back on God and taken a road where they are irreversibly destined for eternal damnation.
In such a case, Hebrews 6:4-8 applies:
4 For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted the heavenly gift, and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit,
5 and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come,
6 if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.
7 For the earth which drinks in the rain that often comes upon it, and bears herbs useful for those by whom it is cultivated, receives blessing from God;
8 but if it bears thorns and briars, it is rejected and near to being cursed, whose end is to be burned. (NKJ)
There is a widespread belief that Deuteronomy 24:1 defines divorce for sexual immorality. However, consider that Leviticus 20:10 clearly states that such people must be put to death : 'The man who commits adultery with another man's wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death. (NKJ). Thus, under the Mosaic covenant death was the penalty for sexual immorality and therefore, by extension, divorce was the penalty for spiritual fornication and betrayal.
In Matthew 5 and Matthew 19, quoted above, Jesus was therefore simply confirming what the Word of God said and, if we will apply a doctrine of Grace under the New Covenant, he was laying a foundation for divorce instead of the physical death penalty in the event of sexual immorality. However, in applying this doctrine of Grace it is necessary to recognize that divorce only applies when Hebrews 6:4-8 ALSO applies. The offender is unrepentant to the extent of turning their back on Jesus.
1 Peter 2:11-4:19 cited in full in the appendix contains some challenging verses:
11 Beloved, ...
...
13 Therefore submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake, whether to the king as supreme,
...
18 Servants, be submissive to your masters with all fear, not only to the good and gentle, but also to the harsh.
19 For this is commendable, if because of conscience toward God one endures grief, suffering wrongfully.
20 For what credit is it if, when you are beaten for your faults, you take it patiently? But when you do good and suffer, if you take it patiently, this is commendable before God.
21 For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps:
22 "Who committed no sin, nor was deceit found in His mouth";
23 who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously;
24 who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness-- by whose stripes you were healed.
25 For you were like sheep going astray, but have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.
CHAPTER 3
1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,
2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.
3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--
4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honour to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
...
9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing.
...
14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you are blessed. "And do not be afraid of their threats, nor be troubled."
...
17 For it is better, if it is the will of God, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.
...
CHAPTER 4
1 Therefore, since Christ suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same mind, for he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin,
2 that he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh for the lusts of men, but for the will of God.
...
12 Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you;
13 but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.
14 If you are reproached for the name of Christ, blessed are you, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. On their part He is blasphemed, but on your part He is glorified.
15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer, a thief, an evildoer, or as a busybody in other people's matters.
16 Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in this matter.
17 For the time has come for judgment to begin at the house of God; and if it begins with us first, what will be the end of those who do not obey the gospel of God?
18 Now "If the righteous one is scarcely saved, where will the ungodly and the sinner appear?"
19 Therefore let those who suffer according to the will of God commit their souls to Him in doing good, as to a faithful Creator. (NKJ)
This entire passage clearly shows that physical persecution is no grounds to flee, rather that we should welcome such persecution for Christ's sake. Accordingly, a woman married to an ungodly man who beats her, particularly because of her faith but not necessarily because of her faith, does not, on the basis of these scriptures, have grounds to flee her marriage! Rather she should count it "all joy" (James 1:2). This is an extremely difficult passage in terms of our current view of things but it is one not to be ignored, particularly since it ends by stating that "judgment will begin in the house of the Lord". This must open the door for a discussion as to why persecution and affliction are coming in a persons life, a question to which there are many answers which can be acted on to bring an end to the affliction in a scriptural way by the leading of the Holy Spirit. But this is another discussion.
At the same time, there are numerous cases in the current age where The Lord HAS permitted divorces to women who have been seriously afflicted in their marriages BUT apparently only once there is no further hope of the husband coming to salvation or of turning away from evil and destruction if he was once a believer.
All too often "love has died" is given as a reason for divorce. However, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 states:
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil;
6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;
7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. (NKJ)
"Love never fails"! Love CANNOT DIE. It can only be murdered by persistent porneia. Therefore, if true porneia has not been committed, the marriage CAN be restored because love CANNOT be dead. The challenge is to find the key to reveal the love that may have been hidden.
In the event of a spouse committing porneia the actions to be taken by the aggrieved spouse should follow the steps set out in Matthew 18:11-17:
11 "For the Son of Man has come to save that which was lost.
12 "What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine and go to the mountains to seek the one that is straying?
13 "And if he should find it, assuredly, I say to you, he rejoices more over that sheep than over the ninety-nine that did not go astray.
14 "Even so it is not the will of your Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.
15 "Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.
16 "But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that 'by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.'
17 "And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector. (NKJ)
a. The party against whom porneia has been committed goes to the party who has committee porneia against them PRIVATELY and explicitly raises the sin AND it's scriptural basis.
b. If this is rejected, take two or three others as witnesses.
c. If this is rejected "tell it to the church", that is the WHOLE congregation of believers where those people fellowship, not just a behind closed doors meeting of a select few.
d. Treat the person as a tax collector. That is courteous but distant.
The key issue is that CONCISE AND ACCURATE scriptural charges must be brought cooly and without emotion out of agape / hesed (covenant) love based concern for the guilty party. They must clearly be told that if they do not repent they face eternal damnation. This is not being harsh, it is simply telling them the truth. The reason to bring them before the entire congregation is NOT to humiliate them, it is to afford them one last opportunity to experience the love of God from as many people as possible who are resolved that the will and word of God are applied in the situation but do not desire to see the person perish.
At all times there must be quietness and gentleness. It is terrible for a man or woman to see the spouse they love turn their back on God and turn to go to eternal damnation.
Note that a woman is under her husband's covering and if he does not follow due process he may carry responsibility for her destruction on the day of judgment.
In the case of church leaders where both spouses have been serving The Lord for decades it is almost inconceivable that within months one could turn away from God to such an extent that divorce is permissible in the sight of God. However, if a couple separate and the wife engages in sexual intercourse with another man, even if she is technically divorced in the sight of man and remarried, porneia will come about very rapidly.
Accordingly, there is almost certainly a period of grace before final judgment although, in cases where the offending spouse has had access to the word of God for many years that period of grace may be short. BUT only The Lord knows the heart.
Equally, we are now in an age of judgement of the church so previous experience does not necessarily apply.
In dealing with a situation where a man and woman who are both prominent in the church announce an intention to divorce, the following approach would be scripturally appropriate:
Concise formulation of scriptural charges with respect to porneia.
a. See other spouse privately and present charges (only those with a scriptural basis).
b. If rejected, take two or three others.
c. If rejected, go before the church council and THEN the entire congregation.
Concurrently with the above, seek to clearly understand the TRUE scriptural basis for healing the marriage. The book "The Scriptural Definition of Marriage", currently in draft, addresses many issues and it's sequel will address many more.
Accept that marriage between believers CANNOT FAIL. Because love never fails, therefore the marriage CAN be healed.
a. Accept the scriptural role of woman:
i. Helpmeet - a wife is a vital part of a man's ministry. He cannot accomplish what he is called to do without her full support.
ii. She is one flesh with him. Therefore SHE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT human being on this earth for him (other than Jesus).
iii. If she strives with him it produces "rottenness" in his bones. Proverbs 12:4 states: "An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones." (NKJ) This is because she is bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh.
iv. The wife is under her husbands covering. He must accept ultimate responsibility for her behaviour. She must accept his authority. He teaches her, she is NOT responsible for correcting him if he is in error. She may express her concern but Jesus Christ is his head.
v. The wife must submit to her husband.
b. Understand and apply submission:
i. Submission is not an option it is a commandment BUT it is not grovelling or weak. Only a strong woman can submit! In this day, it is an act of Iron will that is resolved to put the Word of God first. Such a woman resolves that her husband is the most important human being on this earth after Jesus in her life. She resolves that he is her head. Therefore, she resolves to do EVERYTHING that is required to bring every thought and every action into subjection that she may walk in perfect harmony with him, seeking always what is best for him. But she must recognise that since she is one flesh with him, what is best for him is best for her. Therefore, it is a small matter for her to call him "Lord".
ii. The wife is her husband's underpinning, his house is built on the foundation of her submission. If she will not submit his house will be divided and WILL fall.
iii. Submission IS agreement. It is a decision by a wife to walk with her husband in agreement at all times. Even if sometimes she does not understand what or why he is doing it or EVEN if she feels it is wrong. It is MORE IMPORTANT for her to walk hand in hand with him down the wrong road, thereby putting herself in a position by her presence at his side, to pray appropriately and to gently question that, if indeed he is in error, he will turn. Alternatively, striving she can push him over the edge. If she truly loves him as The Lord intended she will choose to walk into the wilderness WITH him rather than strive with him.
iv. The only exception to the above would be where sin is absolutely clear cut, such as the husband commanding his wife to have sexual intercourse with another man. In such a case she should no doubt resist, however, the passage in 1 Peter 2 to 4 cited above raises questions even in such cases as to whether such resistance should amount to a refusal to submit. He is the head and HE will carry her sin in such cases! In such a case, scripture requires her to go "silently to the slaughter" if he seeks to destroy her. It is only by her meekness, gentleness, selflessness and submission that she will turn him. NOT by shouting, screaming and anger.
c. Understand the true role of sexual intercourse in marriage.
i. Scripture clearly shows that sexual intercourse with a virgin IS the ACT of marriage (Deuteronomy 22 and other verses, cited in the appendix) AND that this is the act of cutting of the marriage covenant.
ii. Therefore, sex and marriage are indivisible. Woman is told in Genesis 3:16 that her desire SHALL be for her husband. Thus, in the same was as with submission, it is an act of her will to desire her husband AND to give herself to him totally and without holding back in any aspect of her sexuality and capability.
iii. In an earthly sense she is required to worship her husband (Ephesians 5 AMP) with her body. This requires that, as we are required to take the lead in worshipping The Lord she must take the lead in worshipping (making love to) her husband. Recognise that "making love" is the ACT of building love between man and wife. Thus sexual intercourse is a prerequisite for building a Godly marriage. That is why Satan has attacked sex in so many ways and why Satanist's use sex as a powerful bonding tool.
In such situations there are many more scriptures and scriptural principles that apply.
However, the first step is a decision!
People in such circumstances face a fork in the road. One road leads to perdition and destruction, the other is Jesus' way.
In every case, the spouse who has not turned away from the marriage must first decide whether they are prepared to go The Lord's way. Then the other spouse must make the same decision.
If both decide to do what is right then they will both need considerable counselling and prayer UNDER PROPHETIC MINISTERS in order to deal with the underlying issues and to come into line with the word of God in their marriage and their ministry.
May Yahweh[1] bless you and keep you;
Yahweh make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you;
Yahweh lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace.
1 Peter 2:11-4:19
11 Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul,
12 having your conduct honourable among the Gentiles, that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may, by your good works which they observe, glorify God in the day of visitation.
13 Therefore submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake, whether to the king as supreme,
14 or to governors, as to those who are sent by him for the punishment of evildoers and for the praise of those who do good.
15 For this is the will of God, that by doing good you may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men--
16 as free, yet not using liberty as a cloak for vice, but as bondservants of God.
17 Honour all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.
18 Servants, be submissive to your masters with all fear, not only to the good and gentle, but also to the harsh.
19 For this is commendable, if because of conscience toward God one endures grief, suffering wrongfully.
20 For what credit is it if, when you are beaten for your faults, you take it patiently? But when you do good and suffer, if you take it patiently, this is commendable before God.
21 For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps:
22 "Who committed no sin, nor was deceit found in His mouth";
23 who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously;
24 who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness-- by whose stripes you were healed.
25 For you were like sheep going astray, but have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.
CHAPTER 3
1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,
2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.
3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--
4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honour to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous;
9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing.
10 For "He who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit.
11 Let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and His ears are open to their prayers; but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."
13 And who is he who will harm you if you become followers of what is good?
14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you are blessed. "And do not be afraid of their threats, nor be troubled."
15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;
16 having a good conscience, that when they defame you as evildoers, those who revile your good conduct in Christ may be ashamed.
17 For it is better, if it is the will of God, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.
18 For Christ also suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive by the Spirit,
19 by whom also He went and preached to the spirits in prison,
20 who formerly were disobedient, when once the Divine longsuffering waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight souls, were saved through water.
21 There is also an antitype which now saves us-- baptism (not the removal of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God), through the resurrection of Jesus Christ,
22 who has gone into heaven and is at the right hand of God, angels and authorities and powers having been made subject to Him.
CHAPTER 4
1 Therefore, since Christ suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same mind, for he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin,
2 that he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh for the lusts of men, but for the will of God.
3 For we have spent enough of our past lifetime in doing the will of the Gentiles-- when we walked in lewdness, lusts, drunkenness, revelries, drinking parties, and abominable idolatries.
4 In regard to these, they think it strange that you do not run with them in the same flood of dissipation, speaking evil of you.
5 They will give an account to Him who is ready to judge the living and the dead.
6 For this reason the gospel was preached also to those who are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.
7 But the end of all things is at hand; therefore be serious and watchful in your prayers.
8 And above all things have fervent love for one another, for "love will cover a multitude of sins."
9 Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.
10 As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.
11 If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.
12 Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you;
13 but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.
14 If you are reproached for the name of Christ, blessed are you, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. On their part He is blasphemed, but on your part He is glorified.
15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer, a thief, an evildoer, or as a busybody in other people's matters.
16 Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in this matter.
17 For the time has come for judgment to begin at the house of God; and if it begins with us first, what will be the end of those who do not obey the gospel of God?
18 Now "If the righteous one is scarcely saved, where will the ungodly and the sinner appear?"
19 Therefore let those who suffer according to the will of God commit their souls to Him in doing good, as to a faithful Creator. (NKJ)
Deuteronomy 22:13-30 states:
13 "If any man takes a wife, and goes in to her, and detests her,
14 "and charges her with shameful conduct, and brings a bad name on her, and says, 'I took this woman, and when I came to her I found she was not a virgin,'
15 "then the father and mother of the young woman shall take and bring out the evidence of the young woman's virginity to the elders of the city at the gate.
16 "And the young woman's father shall say to the elders, 'I gave my daughter to this man as wife, and he detests her;
17 'now he has charged her with shameful conduct, saying, "I found your daughter was not a virgin," and yet these are the evidences of my daughter's virginity.' And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city.
18 "Then the elders of that city shall take that man and punish him;
19 "and they shall fine him one hundred shekels of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought a bad name on a virgin of Israel. And she shall be his wife; he cannot divorce her all his days.
20 "But if the thing is true, and evidences of virginity are not found for the young woman,
21 "then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done a disgraceful thing in Israel, to play the harlot in her father's house; so you shall put away the evil from among you.
22 "If a man is found lying with a woman married to a husband, then both of them shall die-- the man that lay with the woman, and the woman; so you shall put away the evil from Israel.
23 "If a young woman who is a virgin is betrothed to a husband, and a man finds her in the city and lies with her,
24 "then you shall bring them both out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them to death with stones, the young woman because she did not cry out in the city, and the man because he humbled his neighbour's wife; so you shall put away the evil from among you.
25 "But if a man finds a betrothed young woman in the countryside, and the man forces her and lies with her, then only the man who lay with her shall die.
26 "But you shall do nothing to the young woman; there is in the young woman no sin deserving of death, for just as when a man rises against his neighbour and kills him, even so is this matter.
27 "For he found her in the countryside, and the betrothed young woman cried out, but there was no one to save her.
28 "If a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed, and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out,
29 "then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife because he has humbled her; he shall not be permitted to divorce her all his days.
30 "A man shall not take his father's wife, nor uncover his father's bed. (NKJ)
Verses 13 to 21 clearly indicate that if a woman is not a virgin on her wedding day she is a harlot and worthy of death. Revelation 21:8 clearly states that such people will have a part in the second death "But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death." (NKJ) 1 Corinthians 6:9 states that such people will not inherit the kingdom of God. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, (NKJ)
Furthermore, careful consideration of Deuteronomy 22:13 to 21 indicates that the act of taking a woman's virginity IS THE ACT OF MARRIAGE, Deuteronomy 22 verses 28 to 29 (cited above) confirm this as does Exodus 22:16 "If a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed, and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife."
In simple terms scripture defines a number of distinct sexual and spiritual states for a woman, a virgin (a woman who has not had sexual intercourse), a married woman (one who has had sexual intercourse with ONE man), a harlot or adulteress (a woman who has had sexual intercourse with MORE THAN ONE man) and a widow (seemingly includes a woman divorced in the sight of God but there is no explicit scripture to back this up).
There is NO provision in scripture for marriage to take the form of "vows in church" or the "exchange of rings" or any of the other traditions that are prevalent today. There IS historical information to indicate that the present form of marriage ceremony has pagan roots and was only instituted about 500 years ago. However, in the intervening period the church has come to believe that the act of an official "marriage ceremony" officiated over by a pastor or "priest" has greater substance than the act of taking a woman in marriage by taking her virginity as set out in the above scriptures. This has led to a situation where many in the church actually believe that there is such a thing as "sex before marriage" and then use Genesis 2:24 "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." (KJV) in the context of marriage.
The word cleave clearly relates to the word "cleaver" as in "meat cleaver" something which forcibly cuts meat, a "cleft" in a rock, the "plane of cleavage" in a crystal, etc. "Cleave" in Genesis 2:24 clearly relates to the act of sexual intercourse, the man cleaves = cut's into, his wife. Study of the Hebrew reveals that "cleave" or "cut" (as in Genesis 15:10 where God cut covenant with Abram) has the same root as "covenant" and so we learn that the act of a man cleaving (cutting) into the flesh of his virgin wife IS THE ACT OF THE MARRIAGE COVENANT and the blood of her virginity is the BLOOD OF THE MARRIAGE COVENANT.
We thus see that virginity is ABSOLUTELY HOLY AND SACRED!
In addition, Genesis 2:24 states that when a man cleaves into a woman they will become "one flesh". Matthew 19:5-6 in the Amplified Bible states "And said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be united (joined inseparably) to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder (separate)." (AMP)
It is particularly important to note the amplification "joined inseparably" in the above passage. Taken together with the phrase "let not man put asunder" this starts to reveal the full extent of the one flesh bond as an unbreakable spiritual bond granted by God in order to bind husband and wife together. As the bond intensifies through repeated sexual intercourse, so will love also intensify if both parties give themselves to one another in accordance with scripture. "Making love" is indeed just that! 1 Corinthians 6, quoted below, clearly reveals that multiple one flesh bonds can coexist. Matthew 19:5-6 clearly indicates that the one flesh bond cannot be broken by man.
Even if a woman is not a virgin but is a harlot the man who lies with her STILL BECOMES ONE FLESH WITH HER - 1 Corinthians 6:15-20:
15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not!
16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For "the two," He says, "shall become one flesh."
17 But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him.
18 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.
19 Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?
20 For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's. (NKJ)
We thus see that every time a man has sexual intercourse with a woman he becomes IRREVERSIBLY (barring an act of Grace on the part of The Lord) part of her. This is a spiritual bond which is NOT broken by repentance, it is a cord of spiritual iron which binds that man and woman together for LIFE!
[1] NOTE (1) : The word "Yahweh1" is used in this document to reflect the fact that the correct translation of the Hebrew word generally translated "The Lord" in the King James Version and many others is, in fact, "Yahweh". Yahweh is the proper name for our God and occurs 6,828 times in the Old Testament. Vines states:
"LORD
The divine name YHWH appears only in the Bible. Its precise meaning is much debated. God chose it as His personal name by which He related specifically to His chosen or covenant people." (from Vine's Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words, (Copyright (C) 1985, Thomas Nelson Publishers)
By way of analogy, my proper name is "James" and I have the designation of "husband" to my wife, it would not be indicative of a meaningful marriage relationship if my wife were to constantly refer to me as "husband" rather than "James". In the same way, it is not indicative of a meaningful relationship with our God to refer to Him as "Lord" rather than "Yahweh" when He has given us His name to use and uses it throughout scripture.
For more information refer to the book "The Sacred Name" published by Qadesh La Yahweh Press, available on the internet at: http://www.yahweh.org/publications/pdf1/sacrednm.pdf
[MAKERATING]
The comment feature is locked by administrator.